My side of story!

First of all you dont even fucking no me and dont know anything about me! you didnt care about how im gonna feel about you going behind my back after all thse time im being honest and real to you! i thought you were fucking different from others but your just the same. The fact that you fucking rather trust some ramdon guys rather than your own fucking boyfriend wow all i can say is that your just stupid! you just fucking creat your worse anemy! everything were going well after you have to messed it up you dont even know whos that guy whos at my house the couples nights ago, you didnt even bother to ask but instead you fucking made your stupid decision with out even fucing comfirming to me whats going on or what so ever! you know what i hope your happy and best of luck with you! and i want my stuff back and you can have yours im done with you! first i thought i messed up but to think about it no i didnt You your the one who messed up!

I didnt meant to hurt you!

IM REALLY SORRY PLEASE FORGIVE ME =(

I'LL ACCEPT WHAT EVER YOUR DICISION IS

BUT I JUST WANT TO LET YOU KNOW

THAT I DO LOVE YOU!

Life goes on!

Day by day i tell myself why is my life like this? does god made me like this for any reasson? cause it seem to me that for me being 19 years old im carrying so much shit on my should and that shouldnt be this hard for my age! But hey i still live and goes along and get up every single day even though i tried to give up and stop but somethings tell me to continued and nevers give up! So many things that happen to me lately that is completely new to me like getting a tattoo lol can you believe that i mean ive been thingking about getting one but i never thought that i would actually get one on the spot with my cousins! getting a tattoo made me think that hey if i can handdle this pain i can handdle almost anything right now! by me not giving up in life made me a better person and stronger than i am right now! I thank my friends and family that support every single things i do in my life! i mean im pretty much sure with out them im nothing i wont be able to do stuff that i do right now with out concerning any of my friends or family! anyways this is for today i know i havent been here but you'll be reading and get more update about my life soon=)

Excited!

well its been a while since i posted something on here so i decided to log on and write something about me. anyuways i dont even know why im freaking excited on going back to school, i mean who does like school i know i dont but the fact that im excited to go back and start tomorrow theres something wrong lol! i know its funny but f*ck i cant wait for it, its like ive been waiting for it for while now i guess cause of me being on a vacation for half semester thats why i think i miss school!

Unsolve!

Here i go again feeling so angry and being short temper! GOSH i dont know whats the matter with me, theres a time that i just wanna be alone but when im alone i feel like im gonna go crazy. I promise myself that i would never let anyone make me feel this way but i dont know i guess im just not so strong that i thought i was! theres just something in me that its unsolve that been waiting for me to figure it out how to solve it but i just cant seem to find the answer to it.

Why cant i just be happy for what i have in my life right now i guess god made my life to be like this, but i wanna be made i wanna change and everytime i found someone who can i think can help me out seem to be the one whos making it worse and i dont know why im letting them. I am to nice enough to not find the happyness in life.

Sometimes i just think that i can never be happy no more after what ive been through i dont think i can handdle another single painful feelings deep inside me. i want to give up but something telling me to keep pushing and i'll get through this, but fuck when i want it to stop i cant handle it no more.

I;m to young to feel so much pain in life im fucking 19 years old but my whole entire life has been a mess! my friends look up to me and always see's me smiling and happy but what dont they know that their life is way better than mine, i just cant take the fact that im happy outside but when you look inside its just cold and dark.

I guess my life is just unsolve and shouldnt be solve at this momment, i understand that everything takes time but we will see if i can last till then. I'll be looking up and walk straight like nothings wrong with me i mean thats what i do every single day and i turn out to be fine, just that once in a while i feel empty inside me grrrr which i hate the most.

to be continue........